Friday, April 6, 2012

Lily pics by month, Nov '09 to April '10

She came to live with us late in October, 2009. I literally could not make eye contact with her without getting up to cross the room and kiss her - she had me under some sort of spell.

November 2009:





December 2009:










January 2010:





February 2010:








Aunt Micky brought me this stuffed bunny as part of a bar-exam-study-care-basket, and Lily instantly adopted it. She'd groom it and snuggle down next to it for hours, and we knew we had to get her a real little buddy, so we adopted Vinny.



March 2010:


This was the day I learned she could get up on the dining room table on her own.






Her yawns were the best, and so hard to photograph. Right before we took her to the vet clinic on her last night, she hopped over to where I was laying on the floor, stretched real big, and yawned right in my face. She's just so cute.



April 2010:



The look on my face here is exactly how she made me feel.
Pure love and contentment.





This was the first day she had real freedom in the yard, after the Hubs fenced off the garden area for her. Knowing how happy she was out there got me off the couch and outside a lot more than I'd ever been before. She didn't quite convert me to "outdoorsy," but she did make me into a gardener.

This spring will be the first garden I've planted in our house without her company. I had planned on starting a bunch of seeds this week; I bought them a few hours before she passed away. Now I can't bring myself to plant them. Peas/cilantro/cucumbers/lettuce don't sound any good, knowing I can't share them with my sweet girl.


There are more months, more pictures, but I need a break. Snuggle Vinny, drink some tea, and zone out in front of Friends for a while. Poor Hubs is stuck at work, but he's taking tomorrow off so he can rest and recover a little bit. Tonight we're going to bury our girl out at River's Wish.

Love, J

4.6.12


I can't believe she's gone. She was only 3. I told her countless times that I needed her to live well beyond a rabbit's average lifespan of 10-12 years. I just loved her too much, and as I loved her, I knew it would hurt an unbearable amount when one day she wasn't around anymore.

But I expected that day to be years and years from now.

Damn everything.

No.

Fuck everything.

Yes. Fuck.

I miss her, J

Thursday, April 5, 2012

We grieve




About six weeks ago, the hubs and I built this box labyrinth for the bunnies, to keep them (and us) entertained. I didn't upload the pictures until yesterday, when I wanted recent Lily photos for my post.

Though their relationship started out rough, Vinny and Lily wound up bonding entirely. He's quieter about it than I've been (that is, no loud, theatrical weeping), but he is grieving along with us.

We left them together, as the books all recommend, for a while so that he could come to terms with her being gone. He stayed snuggled up next to her all night and all day. It was hard to watch, but I'm glad we knew to let him have time with her, because I can tell it's the right thing.

Sad times are so much harder when the one you would go to for comfort is the one who has gone. Lily was so patient with me on my down days. She'd let me pet her forever, and she'd just close her eyes when I'd bury my face in her forehead and soak her fur with tears. I have a lot of tears now, but none of the other rabbits much like that sort of needy-attention.

I miss her. And the Hubs; and Vinny; and everyone. We all miss her.

Love, J