Yesterday I got my bar exam results in the mail, and opened them eagerly, because I knew I'd passed and was excited to get the news. I was wrong.
Today I woke up in a blind panic, positive that there had been some mistake with the exam results. I felt really, really good about how I'd done, and I had studied my ass off. So at 4:30 am I pulled on my sweats, jumped in the car, and drove to Seattle to get a copy of my test and find out what had happened. When they gave it to me, I thumbed through it and found that there was no mistake. My answers all uploaded correctly. My test didn't get mixed up with someone else's. I just failed. So I got in the car and drove back home, with the new, awful knowledge of what it's like to have complete faith in yourself only to find out that you shouldn't have.
More later (more complaining, I'm sure), but now I'm still shell-shocked and in denial about the whole having-to-do-this-all-over-again thing. I need to curl up and whimper until that's out of my system. Be back in a few days.
Love, J
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